Conflicted About Violence
Every man from time to time has thoughts of barbaric violence. Then the voice of civilization chimes in to reason with him. It is every man's choice which voice to choose from.
Today was the first day I shot a revolver, or more broadly, today was the first day I shot a gun at all. I just want to describe the feeling I got. I pulled up on the parking lot with my uncle and dad in the car. The parking lot was obviously full of SUVs and pickup trucks. We entered the sunlit wood building slowly and predictably to trying not to cause any alarm. The center of the store had a ring of counters under which knives, pistols, machine guns, and shotguns were littered. I had always seen guns like these in the hands of guards of my neighborhood when I lived overseas, in particular light machine guns, but never in this context. The atmosphere was more dire. Being Muslim, it was as if we were entering enemy territory for some reason, at least that was what I felt.
The stout white man in the middle of the counter with his puffy nose, and white circle beard welcomed us. He was a friendly man. Soon, he was talking about his bear hunting trip in Upper Peninsula, Michigan. We examined the merchandise, walking and talking in a deliberate, deliberately predictably slow and friendly manner. Eventually after some paper signing, ID checking, protective headphone wearing, we entered the firing range. The whole experience would cost $80 and would last either as long as the bullets lasted or an hour, whichever came first. The man taught me how to fire the gun: keep it pointed away from people always, the function of the hammer, how to aim it, how to load and unload the revolver, and finally actually shooting it.
I had my dad with me, as well as my uncle and a couple other black women in the corner of the firing range room as well as the stout white man himself (he did introduce himself to me but I forgot his name). I was a bit jittery loading the gun. I was jittery raising it to point. The rest, will forever be imprinted in my mind in slow motion. I aimed the gun towards the paper target that he posted on the foam that was moved via a motorized cable 50 feet away. He was at my left side putting his arm on my left shoulder. "Keep your right elbow locked," he said. Aiming with my right eye and closing my left eye with my glasses on, I lined up the red insert (front of the gun) with the rear sight thing. I took a shaky breath, held it to stabilize myself and pulled the trigger. I could see the golden bullet gleaming from the edge of the barrel. I remember a bright flash of light. I remember a massive force pushing back the gun, and along with the gun, me. I mean, it wasn't just a push from the gun, there was a push from the gun but there was a massive air pressure that came from the mini explosion as well. I couldn't see the bullet exiting. BANG!!
You know that feeling when you receive bad news about a loved one? Your heart sinks and time slows down and your gut aches. You want to crumble to the floor. I had honestly felt that I had killed someone. That thought consumed my mind for a few seconds. The stout man patted my shoulder and said, "Hey good job," and told me to fire another. My hands in the same location, I tried to pull the trigger again. Nothing happened. I had to pull the hammer down. I did that. I aimed the gun and pulled the trigger again. BANG!! I hit nearly the middle of the target.
He handed me a key tag that said, "Range Certified". I put down the gun, smiled, grabbed the tag, and hurried away from the gun. After my dad and my uncle became "Range Certified" too, it was my turn to fire once again. I familiarized myself with the routine: barrel out, load the bullets, barrel in, hammer down, point, aim, fire, and repeat the hammer down, point, aim, fire indefinitely. I ran out of bullets and clumsily emptied out the shells of the bullets from the revolving barrel. I put the gun down, facing the range, and away from my family. Then, it was my dad's turn. He fired five bullets but not as accurate as mine. Then it was my uncle's turn. He wasn't as accurate either. We revolved the revolver between us three. Each time we would fire 5 bullets in our human silhouette paper targets. They had done it in the past and they were beaming in joy. It was a masculine activity after all, to train with weapons. I enjoyed the rush too, though, my rush was a mixture of fear, wonder, and a quenching of every man's thirst for power.
The following might surprise female readers.
Every man from time to time has thoughts of barbaric violence. Then the voice of civilization chimes in to reason with him. It is every man's choice which voice to choose from.
"I could potentially kill everyone in this room if I wanted to, just turn around and bang bang," said Satan to me.
"But you could also do the same thing with a knife, or a car, or a bioweapon," I responded to myself.
I reflected each time before and after I pulled the trigger...
Later that day I took my mom, aunt, sisters, and female cousins to a shopping mall. Not wanting to deal with the mind numbing boredom that is associated with being of a male during such an activity, I bounced. I went off to the theater. I arrived to the theater at 6:39 and the fourth Purge was playing at exactly 6:40. Perfect. Here is a trailer of it below.
I watched a couple of previews, one of which was a horror movie.
No guns, but violence nonetheless. So are guns really to blame for any violence?
So the movie began.
Below is a summary of the Purge.
Once upon a time, there was a financial and social crisis in the USA. Every day crime was rampant. One day, the government decided to legalize all crime for 12 hours annually. Because of that, there was much resistance to the idea but eventually a few murders did occur. Because of that, the government decided to launch their own murder squads. Because of that, the local mob decided to protect the people (government is bad and local criminals are good). Until finally, the Purge ends and everyone lives the year (injured or lost a loved one) happily ever after.
I walked outside in a park at around sunset after the movie was over.
If killing truly is so easy, with a single pull of a trigger, then why don't we see more of it?
There was a lot of killing in that movie: stabbings, explosions, and gunfire. At the beginning of the movie, prior to the Purge, people doubted that any violence would take place. At the beginning of the Purge, there wasn't much crime; there was only an (expected) ATM robbery and a single murder. After a few hours into a social situation with no accountability, crime became the only way to survive. If, in the Purge, it only took a few hours of no accountability for society to unwind, then consider the potential situation we can land our own society without any accountability? What's stopping you from becoming a Purger?
So why do people act peacefully outside of the Purge? In the movie, apparently the only reason is because accountability is expected for every illegal action. In real life, we also expect accountability for every illegal action. But in places like Pakistan where (in some places at least) there is no formal accountability (or at least the probability for receiving accountability for an illegal action is damn low), crime levels do not hit Purge levels. I hypothesize that peace in the absence of law in Pakistan is only regulated by socialization (both from externally applied culture and internally applied religion). Because you have so much practice (socialization) being a law abiding citizen, to think of doing otherwise is unthinkable. This is why we see some atheistic societies maintaining decent law and order without excessive police intervention. Yet at the same time, we saw in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina in 2005 that without any authority to enforce any accountability, there was a wave of crime, a pattern similar to the Purge. (As a side note, if you have ever read N. Taleb's book, Antifragile; perhaps a mediocristan application of authority would keep societies less crime-prone in absence of authority (like in rural Pakistan) than an extremistan application of authority (as we saw in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina in the US)).
Earlier that day, when I was holding the gun and imagining killing someone, accountability only entered my mind when I forced it to, and that type of accountability wasn't even the accountability of the law, it was accountability before God. You can't think of any punishments in the heat of the moment. I knew I didn't. When I had the gun in my hands, I was scared of my own power and I feared the visualizations of dead people. So what did prevent me from killing? I would say great socialization.
But there is no guarantee that the rest of the public is adequately socialized. If I could kill anyone in an instant with a revolver, than really anyone could kill me in an instant if they got their own hands on one. Actually, to do violence, you don't even need a weapon, you just need something big, sharp, or toxic. When I walk outside, I literally have to trust the public with my life. I have to trust that the general public doesn't want to kill me. If anyone could potentially harm me, then why should I trust anyone?
The rational choice, for my own protection at least, was (and still is) to be paranoid to the point of insanity! But that's not the norm! Peace is the social norm! And it is a damn arbitrary social norm too (other than the implied social contract of the Golden Rule)! Things could definitely be a lot worse than they are right now! We assume an absence of violence for no other reason that in the past, peace was the norm! The fact that peace is a social norm is a miraculous blessing!
I can see why Americans are so adamant on keeping the rights to their own weapons; and at the same time, I can see why Americans are so adamant on keeping the rights to own arms away from other Americans!
Lastly, just a thought... Since the norm of societal peace is so whimsical, fragile, and arbitrary, a single murder that doesn't get punished would reduce the confidence of the public in legal accountabilities. This would lead to more crime and potentially more murder. Perhaps the reverse is true: that a single application of proper punishment would increase the confidence of the public in their authority to the point that further crimes would be prevented! Perhaps, you would look at this verse in a new light:
So why do people act peacefully outside of the Purge? In the movie, apparently the only reason is because accountability is expected for every illegal action. In real life, we also expect accountability for every illegal action. But in places like Pakistan where (in some places at least) there is no formal accountability (or at least the probability for receiving accountability for an illegal action is damn low), crime levels do not hit Purge levels. I hypothesize that peace in the absence of law in Pakistan is only regulated by socialization (both from externally applied culture and internally applied religion). Because you have so much practice (socialization) being a law abiding citizen, to think of doing otherwise is unthinkable. This is why we see some atheistic societies maintaining decent law and order without excessive police intervention. Yet at the same time, we saw in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina in 2005 that without any authority to enforce any accountability, there was a wave of crime, a pattern similar to the Purge. (As a side note, if you have ever read N. Taleb's book, Antifragile; perhaps a mediocristan application of authority would keep societies less crime-prone in absence of authority (like in rural Pakistan) than an extremistan application of authority (as we saw in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina in the US)).
Earlier that day, when I was holding the gun and imagining killing someone, accountability only entered my mind when I forced it to, and that type of accountability wasn't even the accountability of the law, it was accountability before God. You can't think of any punishments in the heat of the moment. I knew I didn't. When I had the gun in my hands, I was scared of my own power and I feared the visualizations of dead people. So what did prevent me from killing? I would say great socialization.
But there is no guarantee that the rest of the public is adequately socialized. If I could kill anyone in an instant with a revolver, than really anyone could kill me in an instant if they got their own hands on one. Actually, to do violence, you don't even need a weapon, you just need something big, sharp, or toxic. When I walk outside, I literally have to trust the public with my life. I have to trust that the general public doesn't want to kill me. If anyone could potentially harm me, then why should I trust anyone?
Most drivers assume that other drivers aren't crazy or absolutely incompetent, but that's not necessarily true.
Most mall shoppers assume that other shoppers aren't serial killers, but that's not necessarily true.
Most homeowners assume that their house won't be broken into tonight by thieves, but that's not necessarily true.
I can see why Americans are so adamant on keeping the rights to their own weapons; and at the same time, I can see why Americans are so adamant on keeping the rights to own arms away from other Americans!
Lastly, just a thought... Since the norm of societal peace is so whimsical, fragile, and arbitrary, a single murder that doesn't get punished would reduce the confidence of the public in legal accountabilities. This would lead to more crime and potentially more murder. Perhaps the reverse is true: that a single application of proper punishment would increase the confidence of the public in their authority to the point that further crimes would be prevented! Perhaps, you would look at this verse in a new light:
Because of that, We decreed upon the Children of Israel that whoever kills a soul unless for a soul or for corruption [done] in the land - it is as if he had slain mankind entirely. And whoever saves one - it is as if he had saved mankind entirely. And our messengers had certainly come to them with clear proofs. Then indeed many of them, [even] after that, throughout the land, were transgressors.
-5:32
Conclusion:
Humans never became essentially less violent in the West or anywhere else in the world. Either men hold themselves back better, or they just hide it better.
And I'll say it one last time:
Every man from time to time has thoughts of barbaric violence. Then the voice of civilization chimes in to reason with him. It is every man's choice which voice to choose from.